Chords for 100 Things To Remember

Tempo:
74.7 bpm
Chords used:

E

A

Bm

F#

B

Tuning:Standard Tuning (EADGBE)Capo:+0fret
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100 Things To Remember chords
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[A]
I had a crazy uncle that was on his deathbed a long time ago.
He said, boy, there's a hundred things in life every man needs to know to survive.
And here's 39 of them.
[Am] [A] A virgin don't never drive a Z28, never bet the ranch on your prostate.
If it's got an Adam's apple, it's probably a man.
Never trust a gay gypsy with the [D] palm of your hand.
She didn't accidentally get good in bed.
[Am] You can't join the church if you're already dead.
[E] A work uniform ain't totally [A] nude.
Brim and bass ain't seafood.
When there's guns in the house, one better be yours.
Don't be naked [D] next to any fish in [Am] lures.
If his girl's got cookies, she's a little too [A] young.
If you say I do, be the ugly [D] one.
Don't ever let a ball man borrow your [A] comb.
Never play strip poker in a nursing home.
[E] Don't blame your pallbearers, cause they don't show.
[A] If you're buried in the middle of the Super Bowl.
[B] Let people buy [E] money, they'll leave you [Bm] alone.
Never fry [E] bacon without a shirt [Bm] on.
Never spray [E] water on a hornet's [Bm] nest.
A woman rarely [E] aces the driver's test.
The sign probably don't really mean [Bm] massage.
Never threaten [E] anybody in camouflage.
[F#] Say you love her till [F#m] she lays down to put your [B] knife.
[F#] Never put the move on the boss's [Bm] wife.
She's messing around on you if your briefs don't fit.
Never trust a hitchhiker to babysit.
Cause Mo's never in a happy home.
You can't cut a deal with a kidney [E] stone.
A politician ain't got an HMO.
[Bm] Washing her hair means she don't wanna [F#] go.
Don't ridicule a biker about his tattoo.
[B] You've been married nine times, hell, maybe it's you.
[C#m] New room ain't the [C#] same as Donkey Kong.
If he's wearing high heels, you might've raised him wrong.
The clinic ain't the [F#] best place to pick up [C#m] dates.
Don't rent a room from a man named [F#] Bates.
A tank top's never on a billionaire.
[C#] Stevie Ray Vaughan is the note here [G#m] and there.
How many get to heaven, no one [C#] knows.
But hell of the asses and elbows.
[G#] And then he [E] died.
[B] Crazy fool rolled over and died.
And never did tell me what them other 61 things were.
[C#] So if anybody out there knows,
how about getting a hold of me at
Key:  
E
2311
A
1231
Bm
13421112
F#
134211112
B
12341112
E
2311
A
1231
Bm
13421112
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_ _ _ _ [A] _ _ _
I had a crazy uncle that was on his deathbed a long time ago.
He said, boy, there's a hundred things in life every man needs to know to survive.
_ And here's 39 of them.
[Am] _ _ _ [A] A virgin don't never drive a Z28, never bet the ranch on your prostate.
If it's got an Adam's apple, it's probably a man.
Never trust a gay gypsy with the [D] palm of your hand.
She didn't accidentally get good in bed.
[Am] You can't join the church if you're already dead.
[E] A work uniform ain't totally [A] nude.
Brim and bass ain't seafood.
When there's guns in the house, one better be yours.
Don't be naked [D] next to any fish in [Am] lures.
If his girl's got cookies, she's a little too [A] young.
If you say I do, be the ugly [D] one.
Don't ever let a ball man borrow your [A] comb.
Never play strip poker in a nursing home.
[E] Don't blame your pallbearers, cause they don't show.
[A] If you're buried in the middle of the Super Bowl.
[B] Let people buy [E] money, they'll leave you [Bm] alone.
Never fry [E] bacon without a shirt [Bm] on.
Never spray [E] water on a hornet's [Bm] nest.
A woman rarely [E] aces the driver's test.
The sign probably don't really mean [Bm] massage.
Never threaten [E] anybody in camouflage.
[F#] Say you love her till [F#m] she lays down to put your [B] knife.
[F#] Never put the move on the boss's [Bm] wife.
She's messing around on you if your briefs don't fit.
Never trust a hitchhiker to babysit.
Cause Mo's never in a happy home.
You can't cut a deal with a kidney [E] stone.
A politician ain't got an HMO.
[Bm] Washing her hair means she don't wanna [F#] go.
Don't ridicule a biker about his tattoo.
[B] You've been married nine times, hell, maybe it's you.
[C#m] New room ain't the [C#] same as Donkey Kong.
If he's wearing high heels, you might've raised him wrong.
The clinic ain't the [F#] best place to pick up [C#m] dates.
Don't rent a room from a man named [F#] Bates.
A tank top's never on a billionaire.
[C#] Stevie Ray Vaughan is the note here [G#m] and there.
How many get to heaven, no one [C#] knows.
But hell of the asses and elbows.
_ _ [G#] And then he [E] died.
[B] Crazy fool rolled over and died.
_ And never did tell me what them other 61 things were.
[C#] So if anybody out there knows,
how about getting a hold of me at