Ajax Mortuary Chords by Hudson And Landry

_ _ _ _ _ _ [N] _ _
Ajax.
God bless you.
I don't need any outside help.
_ _ _ _ Ajax Mortuary.
Where
deadliness is next to godliness.
Hello?
You keep sending them over
and we'll keep putting them down.
Way down.
_ Way
_ down upon the swanee.
God bless you.
What are you, some sort of religious fanatic?
_ What do you want anyway?
I was looking for a funeral house.
You're in like a porch climber.
Ajax Mortuary's the name.
Death [F#] is the game.
_ _ Well deal me in.
My brother's dead.
_ _ _ _ Beautiful.
I love it.
He's _ not breathing I hope.
No, heck no.
He quit doing that about an hour before he turned blue. _ _ _
Magnificent.
How did he go?
Well as near as we can figure he got ahold of a bad batch of
chili con carne.
_ _ _ That can be lethal.
Boy it sure turned his light off [B] I'll guarantee. _ _
Yes!
God bless you.
_ He was insured of course.
I don't know whether he had a piece of the rock or not.
_ I_
I realize that at times
like these it's a_
It's a real bummer [F#] to discuss finance.
Don't worry about it partner.
He's dead and somebody's got to pick up the slab tab. _
_ I'll get that money if I've [N] got to kill somebody.
Oh!
Now you're talking.
_ Well he's my brother, you know.
I've got to stand good for him.
Our whole family's that way.
Straight arrow.
Ain't no stiffs among us.
[D#] Mr. uh_
Mr.
Jethro.
Cornelius Jethro. _
93 Death Row.
[A#] _ At [N] your service.
_ You sound like you really think you are. _
_ _ Well as I always say
you don't have to smoke
and drink to have fun.
_ _ [F#] By the way, where is your brother?
Old Arnie?
I stuffed him in the freezer
so he wouldn't spoil on you.
_ _ [C] _ _ That was thoughtful [F#] of you, but he is dead.
Oh he's gone.
Gone.
Gone.
Gone.
Gone [A#] to the great chili parlor in the sky.
All around the chili beans
in the chili con carne.
Round the rancid hamburger
pop goes old Arnie.
_ _ _ _ [N] _ _ _ _
I'd say old Arnie, he's a dead rat. _ _
Well listen,
I'm running real short on cabbage.
You know what I mean?
What's the lowest you'll go?
What's the lowest you'll put a guy down for?
89.50 and we'll put him down.
Way down.
_ _ Way down
south in the land of God. _ _
_ _ _ _ God bless you.
What did you say?
I said God bless you.
You're not some sort of priest, are you?
_ _ Now look,
this 89.50 job, how's that work?
You come pick him up?
Well we have been awfully busy.
Things have been piling up.
_ Well stiff as that sucker is,
I guess it wouldn't be no trick to balance him
on the back of my [A#] Honda. _ _ _ _
[A#] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ I'll just tie him on with some bailing [N] wire.
I should be able to get him down there before he thaws.
Where are you at again? _
93 Death Row.
We'll be expecting you.
Thank you and goodbye.
Sebastian, drop whoever you're doing.
_ [F#] _ _
We've got a live one. _ _ _ _
[N] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _