Chords for Alex Ebert: 'I was looking for death in drugs'

This is Alexander.
[A] I'm Alexander. _
I'm Alexander.
_ _ _ _ _ [Gb] _
_ [Bm] _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[D] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
[G] _ _ _ _ [Bm] _ _ _ _
[D] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ [G] _ _ _ _ [B] _ Alabama, [D] Arkansas, I do love my mom and pop
Not the way that I [G] do love you
[B] But I'm only [Bm] lonely in real life
[D] I think I was three years old, four years old
[G] when I got put in therapy for the first time.
Why?
_ I was hitting children at school
_ _ _ _ _ and they found out that my _ housekeeper _ _ was hitting me
and so when I went to school I would hit kids
_ and so I ended up in therapy for that.
I guess I liked going to school, but I _ found authority sort of silly
so I would sort of do my own thing at school
and _ _ get into trouble consequently
_ _ [C] and as a peace offering, as almost a way to convince the school to let me stay
my mother would say, I'm going to send him to therapy
so I would constantly go to [A] therapy, then stop and get in trouble
and go to therapy, you know what I mean?
[D] _ _ Do the ladies [E] of [A] Phoenix know _ _
[D] Take [E] my heart
_ [D] Oh, fly [A] me in
I came from [G] a small school and when [D] I got to a bigger [G] school
it was [E] all about, [A] fuck, how do I fit in?
How do I [D] make _ [G] _ _
myself comfortable?
And the easiest, quickest way and the most natural way for me
was to just become sort of a clown
I really genuinely never took school seriously
_ and it wasn't like a reaction or something
I just never, it didn't, no matter how [E] much someone told me how [A] important it was
I just, it wasn't important
_ [Bm] _ And I hear [A] myself screaming [E] all the [Bm] truth
Everybody [A] talking but [E] I'm still [Bm] confused
I liked film, [N] I liked rap music
_ Mary Mary, why you buggin'
I started with Run DMC, it was all about the wordplay
and the _ _ _ wordplay was my favorite part, you know
and playing with words and rhyming
_ My fascination with them was sort of one summer
It was one trip actually, one trip
_ I used to go on these long road trips with my dad
and I was just like, really like, paying attention for one summer
and then I got really quickly into a, I had a much longer sort of
like, you know, love affair with NWL
I got a taste of what's in the taste in the blood
Murder I heard over the screen
The drop is a thug, fuck a slug
Relay fist and no shoe
I listen to the straight up men before they ban the fools
While I'm watching the rhythm of a pop king
In college I did a lot of ecstasy and it really fucked up my body _ _
_ But I was constantly looking for the heroin in ecstasy
I wanted to sort of _ _ disassociate
And then [G] eventually, _ you know, I was looking for opium
because it was sort of romantic and poetic
And my friend of mine said, I know where to get opium
I said, okay, let's go
And I remember right before smoking it
I said, are you sure this is opium?
And he said, yeah, yeah, I'm sure
It was heroin
_ But the feeling, you know, I smoked it
I remember I was in Yvonne's parking lot
And I was just like, _ _ oh, [D] this [G] is what I was looking for
[Bm] _ _ [A] _ _ [D] _ _
_ [G] _ _ I [A] _ _ _
[D] _ _ _ _ realized _ later, [Bm] I think, that the main reason why I think
that I was _ [D] sort of even looking for _ death in a way
was [G] that I really didn't [Bm] know how to approach death
And was very, [D] ever since I discovered the concept of dying
and the [G] reality of mortality _ _ _ _
I sort of started a bit of a downward spiral, I think
Until I eventually came to my own sort of terms
[E] and understanding with it, which is what I think
_ led me [D] out of the [A] _ sort of spiral
You know, the way the things you say
The way you win the [E] game
I was like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha
[Bm] Ah, ha, _ I [A] should know [E] better
I guess in a [A] way, [E] it's _ embracing my [Eb] childhood again in a way
[G] _ [E] _ _ My childhood vision of _ the possibility of myself
reclaiming my [Eb] name as opposed to [Em] _ thinking,
oh, I'll [Abm] be this character [A] or that character
[D] _ _ _ [E] _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ [A] _ _ _
_ [Ab] _ _ _ _ _ _ _