Chords for Down's Syndrome Girl (From "Family Guy")

_ [Db] _ _ [Cm] _ _ _ [F] [Bb] You've got to look your best [C] tonight, you tubby little parasite,
Cause there's a lovely [Cm] lady and she's waiting for [F] you.
And [Bb] though her pretty face [C] may seem a special person's weather [Eb] stream,
Before you get to see [Bb] it, there are things you [C] must do.
[Eb] You'll try a [Bb] tie and boutonniere of yellow,
Or a [Ebm] rose that shows that you're a [Ab] classy fellow,
[Eb] With the posh panache [Bbm] of [G] Jefferson and [G] Monticello,
[C] Busting out [Gm] a mile with [Bb] style.
I know you just can't wait to stare at [C] all that luscious orange hair,
[F] But boy, before you touch a single [D] curl,
You must [Em] impress that ultra [Bb]-voomin', all-consuming,
[C] Polly-groomin' down, [Gm] Cinderelm [Dbm] girl.
_ [Cm] _ _ _ [Bb] On any normal [C] day you reek as if you're on a farting streak,
Your [Eb] fingers up your [Bb] nose and you are dripping [F] with drool.
But [Bb] if you want a [G] lady's love, you're better [C] off by smelling of
A gentleman's cologne [Cm] instead of sneakers [Fm] and stool.
[Eb] A squirt, a [Bb] spurt, of something just for Ellen,
[Eb] And you'll see that she [Bb] will find you so compelling,
[Eb] And she does, [Bbm] because the only smell that [G] she'll be smelling
Won't [C] be coming [F] from your bum.
[Bb] You wanna take that little [C] whore and spin her on the dancing floor,
But [Cm] boy, before you do a single [D] [G] twirl,
You [E] must impress that [F] effervescing, self-possessing,
[C] No-BSing down, [Bb] Cinderelm girl.
_ _ _ _ _ _ [F] _
_ _ _ _ _ Her eyes [C] are emerald portals to a [Ebm] secret [Dm] land of love,
[Dm] And they seem to say [G] we'll open just [C] for _ [Dm] Chris.
They _ [G] _ [Cm] _
shine like [C] sunny weather, [E] and they're close enough together,
_ _ _ That [Gb] if they should so desire to create a little fire,
[Db] They could reach across her nose and give each other a kiss.
_ _ _ _ [Dm] _
_ _ _ _ [Db] _ _ _ _
_ [Dbm] _ [B] _ _ [D] _ _ _ _
[C] _ _ _ [Fm] _ _ [D] _ _ [F] _
_ [Em] _ _ _ [Bb] _ _ [F] Oh, _ [Fm] _ _ [C] _ that's not a problem [F] for [Fm] us.
_ [C] _ _ _ _ _
_ [Fm] _ _ _ _ [A] _ _ [D] _
_ [C] _ _ [Eb] _ _ _ My boy, [Ab] between the two of [Bb] us, we'll get you on that shorty bus,
And then you're gonna take it [C] for a [F] whirl.
[Db] Now go [D] impress that super thrilling, wish [F]-fulfilling, yoo-hoo [Db]-spilling,
Ultra-swinging, [Ab] boner-bringing, daily-singing, ding [Db]-a-linging,
Stupefying, [Ab] fortifying, as of [F] Monday, shoelace-tying,
[Ab] Fimulating, titillating, kitty-cat [Db]-infesinating,
Mega-rocking, pillow-talking, just a little crooked-walking,
Poorly-pouting, poopy-sprouting, for some reason [Bbm] always shouting,
Fascinating, [F] captivating, happiness and joy _ _ _ _ -creating,
[Fm] _ [Db] Down, Cinderelm girl.
_ [Eb] _ [Ab] _