Lifeboat Chords by Steve Taylor

_ _ _ Song lifeboat is probably the most satirical song I've ever written and it kind of
Takes a situation to an extreme when I was growing up
we used to play in public schools this game [G#m] called lifeboat where the teacher would come in [N] and
she would say that
Today we're going to play a game a big ship has just sunk and there's five people in this lifeboat
but the lifeboat only really has a room for two people so you class decide which three are going to be thrown overboard and
[C#m] So [G#] we did this song and a video of the song and
I play the teacher and the class [A#] decides who's going to be thrown overboard [G#] and while they're at it
They decide that maybe they don't like [N] this teacher so much either
And finally tonight this report from Channel 7's Don Wilson on the controversy surrounding a new game being played in public elementary schools
You won't find it on the playground
You'll find it in the classroom
The game is called lifeboat and in it the teacher has the school children decide themselves
Who will be tossed out of an overcrowded lifeboat in order to ensure the survival of the fittest?
The game however has generated some controversy in communities like this one where parents are concerned that their children may have taken lifeboat a
Little too far.
I was away from the house getting my nails done
Just like any other Saturday morning when I come home
I find Ashley's lettuce patch dolls in the bottom of the pool with bricks tied to their little legs
I mean do you have any idea how expensive these dolls are?
Or how long I had to stand in line to get one?
_ _ I'm concerned that we're creating power delusions in our children at a very young age
After all eight and nine year olds are far too immature to be making life-and-death decisions
And of course there is that subliminal pressure to be perfect to be a superior member of our society
So as not to be thrown out of the boat as it were _ _ _ Steve _
_ _ _ _ This is it.
What's up?
And you have got your finger on the pulse of today's record buying youth you to my boat.
It's gonna take us to the top
I'm not talking halfway.
I'm not talking three-quarters
I'm talking El Capitan yo, Copa, Ndevu
Huh, I can see it.
I mean I can tell you I can see it.
I see the gold.
I see the platinum
_ I see a lot of precious metal _
Look, I already said it was bozo after from the album cover, but this is out of the question Steve
_ Hey, buddy, pal, hombre
Huh?
Who you nodding to?
It's me, Chuck, your manager.
I love you more than my own brother
I am NOT going to stand in front of a camera looking.
What is this?
Am I robbing a bank?
I'm not gonna stand in front of a camera looking like [A#] a school mom _ _ _ _ _
[D] Good _ _ [G] _ _ [A] _
[D] morning class
_ _ [Em] Today [A] _
[D] we're going to play a game
_ [Bm] This _ [A] game is [D] called like a whole
_ [Em] Life [A] _ _
[D] vote is a lesson [G] in values clarification.
[A] Can [D] you say values clarification?
_ [G] _ _ [A] Values clarification [D] is where your little minds decide [G] which lives are worth living [A] and which lives are worth [D] _ not living
[G] Now, here's how [A] we play.
Big [D] ship, just sight.
There are five [Bm] people on the life boat, [A] but [D] the life boat is only made for two
I'll list the five [Gm] people on the chart board [D] and you class will decide which three will be [Bm] friend of the board
Are we ready?
[D] Yes, Mr.
Darien
_ [G] Good
First, [D] there's an old, old crippled grandmother
[Bm] Second, there's a [C#m] mentally handicapped person [D] in a wheelchair
What's mentally [Bm] handicapped?
[G] It [A] means they can never be [D] a productive member of society
[G] Third, there's an [C#m] overweight woman on welfare [D] with a slippery, whimpering baby
[G] Is the baby [A] on welfare too? _
_ [D] _ [B] Let's make a list of [C#m] friends
_ [D]
Who else is in the boat?
[Bm] A young, [C#] white toddler with blue eyes [D] and perfect teeth and a [Bm] golden heart
Now class, [C#m] take five minutes [D] to make your decision I'm ready Go class
[C#m] _ _ [D]
Blow [C] out the candles, [G] she's getting pretty old
[D] Blow out [Am] the big coal, we'll all be catching [D] it's cold
Hold [C] on tight and [G] we'll see if she can float
[D] Blow out [C] the big tarp as [D] they're both being rockin' the boat
_ _ [G] Very [A] good
That was fun, [D] wasn't it?
Yes, [Bm] Mr.
[A] Darien
For [D] our next lesson, we're going to do an experiment [G] Yay!
[A] _ _ [D]
We're going to test the law of gravity, [G] just like [A] Galileo, by dropping [D] two objects out the window
One heavy and [G] one light, to test [A] which one hit the [D] sidewalk first
Now what [G] shall we use for the lighter object?
[A] I'm thinking of something [D] smaller and square An [G] eraser?
[A] Good, [D] and what shall we use for the heavy object?
I'm [G] thinking of something round [A] _ [D] and_
Bobby, I [G] want to give you permission to make [A] your decision
[D] Class, the bell is not [G] rung
What if [A] it_
Oh, [D]
class, [G] put me down
Class, put [A] me down, please
What [D] if_
_ _ [G] _ [A] For _ [D] _
[C] our teacher, and [G] we'll see if she can float
[D] We learned [C] our lesson, teacher [Am] [Bm] says [C] perfection [Am] was [D] found
[C] Steady, low, then pray [G] and wish it up they go
_ [D]
Grow up, [C] our teacher, and [D] we'll play another game of life, [E] though
No more [D] crap talk, cause [A] it's getting pretty dull
_ [E]
Grow up, [D] our baby, and [Bm] we'll all [C#m] [Bm] be happy [E] this fall
No over [D]-night, and [A] we'll see if she can float
[E] Grow up, [D] our teacher, and [E] we'll keep on teaching _
_ _ [A] _ _ [E] _ _ [B] _ [E] _
_ _ [A] _ _ _ [B] _ _ [E] _