Chords for The Piano Has Been Drinking (Bounced Checks version '81)

_ _ Oh, Jesus.
[Ab] _ _
_ [Bbm] _ _ _ _ [F] _ _ _
_ [B] _ _ _ [F] _ _ _ _
[Gb] _ _ _ [G] _ _ _ _ [Ab] _
_ _ _ [G] _ _ _ _ [A] _
_ _ [Gb] _ _ _ _ [Db] _ _
_ [D] _ _ _ _ [Dbm] _ _ _
_ [A] _ _ _ [E] Well, the piano has been [A] drinking.
_ _ _ [E] _ _ _
[Db] My necktie is asleep.
[Bb] And the [Bbm] combo went [Db] back to New York.
[Gm] And left me all alone.
[Eb] _ And the jukebox [Bbm] has to take a leak.
_ [Db] _ _ _ [A] Have you noticed that the carpet [Gm] needs a haircut?
_ _ [A] _
And the spotlight [E] looks just like a [Gm] prison break.
[Eb] And the telephone's out of [Gm] cigarettes. _ _ _ _
And [Ab] as usual, the balcony's on [Db] the make.
_ _ [E] _ And the [A] piano has been drinking.
_ _ _ [Ab] _ Heavily.
_ _ _ _ [Dbm] The piano has been [E] drinking.
_ _ [Gb] He's on the hard stuff [Dbm] tonight.
_ _ _ [Bbm] _ _
The [A] piano has been drinking. _ _ _
_ [E] And you can't [Ab] find your waitress.
_ [Bbm] Even with a Geiger [A] counter. _
[Ab] And I guarantee you that [F] she will hate you from the [Gm] bottom of her glass.
_ [G] And all of your friends.
[Gb] _ _ But [Bbm] mind you, you just can't [Ab] get served without her.
[Db] And the piano has been [Gb] drinking.
_ _ _ [Bbm] _ _
The [F] piano has been drinking. _ _ _
[Ab] _ _ _ [Ab] _ _ _ The white [Eb] man's blind in one eye and he can't see out [Bb] of the other.
_ [Db] And the piano tuner's got [D] a [Ab] hearing aid and he [Gb] showed up with his [Bb] mother.
_ _ [F] And the piano has been drinking.
[Gb] _
_ _ _ [Gm] _ _ Without [F]
fear of contradiction, I say the [D] piano has been drinking.
[G] _ _ _ _ _ _
[Bb] Our father who art in [Db] Cribari, _
_ [Ab] hallowed be thy [Bb] class, thy [Cm] kingdom come, thy will be [E] done.
On [G] earth as it is in the [E] lounges. _ _
[G] Give us this day [Ab] our daily _ splash.
_ _ [D] Forgive us our _ [A] hangovers.
_ As [Bbm] we forgive all those [G] who continue to hang [Bbm] over against us.
_ [Ab] _ And lead us not into temptation [Db] but deliver [Dbm] us from evil.
And [Bb] someone _ [A] give us all a ride home.
_ _ [Ab] _ _ [A] _ _ _
_ [E] _ Because _ [F] _ _ _
_ [E] _ _ the [Db] piano has been drinking.
[A] _ _ _ _ _ [Db] And he's your [Gb] friend, not mine.
_ _ [Db] _ _ _
[Bb] The piano has been [Bbm] drinking [Ab] and he's not [Abm] my _ responsibility.
[Gb] _ _ _
_ [Bb] _ _ _ _ [F] _ _ _
[Bbm] The bouncer is this [Db] sumo wrestler, [Bbm] kind of cream puff [F] Casper Miltoast.
_ [Ab] _ And the owner is just a [Eb] mental midget [F] with the IQ of [Bbm] a fence post.
And [F] _ I'm [Bbm] going down. _
_ _ [Ab] Hang on to me, I'm [Db] going down.
_ _ _ [E] _ _ _ _ [Eb] _
_ _ [Db] _ _ _ [Gb] Watch me skate across an [Bb] acre of linoleum.
[A] _
_ _ _ [Db] _ I know [Cm] I can do it.
_ _ _ [Bb] _ _ I'm in [Cm] total control.
_ [Db] _ _ _ [Gb] _ _
_ _ _ [Dbm] And the [Ab] piano has been drinking and [A] he's embarrassing [Gb] me.
_ _ _ [G] _ _ The [A]
piano has been drinking.
[Dbm] _ _ _ [F] He raided his mini [Bb] bar.
_ The [Ab] piano has been drinking.
[Bbm] _ _ _ _ [Gb] And the bar [E] stools are all on fire [Ab] and all the newspapers [Bbm] were just fooling.
_ And the ice trays [F] have retired.
[Db] And I've got a [Gb] feeling that the piano has been drinking.
[D] _ _
It's just a hunch.
_ _ [A] _ _ _
_ [Bb] The [Bbm] piano has [G] been drinking and [E] he's going to lose [A] his lunch. _
[Ab] And the piano has been [F] drinking. _ _
_ _ _ _ [Fm] Not me.
_ [Dbm] _
_ [A] _ Not me.
[Bbm] _ _ _
_ [A] _ The [E] piano has been drinking.
[Dbm] _ _ Not me.
_ [Gb] _ _ _ _ _ _ [Ab] _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _