Chords for Hairspray Live! Cast - (The Legend of) Miss Baltimore Crabs (Lyrics)

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_ _ _ _ _ [C] _ _ _
_ _ _ _ _ [Fm] I brought my own 45s, [Abm] so if you want to put them [D] on I'll show you my stuff.
[Ab] Haven't you shown [Bb] us enough?
_ [D] Oh my god, [C] how [Fm] times have [G] changed.
This [Abm] girl's either blind or [B] [Abm] completely deranged.
[Bbm] All the times [G] seemed to halt when I [Fm] was Miss Baltimore _ Crown.
[Abm] It's always been my dream to [Db] dance on the show.
[D] Aw, maybe you ought to go back to sleep.
_ _ Childhood [C] dreams for me [Fm] were cracked
[G] when that dance [Abm] turned the [B] temples, no more I'm freaking [Abm] out.
[Bbm] But the crowns and the vaults, for when I won Miss [B] [Fm] Baltimore _ _ _
[Ab] _ [Eb] Crowns.
[Bbm] Those poor runner-ups may still [G] hold some [Cm] grudges, they've had their cups.
But I [F] screwed the judges.
[Ebm] Those broads thought they'd win if [F] a [Dm] plate they put [C] spin in their _ [Db] dance.
[C] _ Not a [Db] chance, [Fm] cause I hit the [D]
[Ab] stage, [Fm] batons _ [F] ablaze. _ _
_ _ _ [G] While [Abm] belting high C's and preparing tea souffles. _ _ _ _
[Db] _ _ _ [Bbm] But that triple somersault was how I [E] clinched Miss [Fm] Baltimore _ _
[D] _ Crowns.
Almost dinner time, shouldn't you be waddling along?
Amber, haven't I taught you not to judge a book by its cover?
No.
This is America, [Db] where everyone deserves a separate but equal chance to fail.
I'll handle this.
Are you [Eb] scared we're online?
[F] No, I'm sure I [Gbm] can cope.
[Ab] Well, this show [D] isn't broadcast in CinemaScope.
[Bm] I never drank one chocolate moat, no desserts for Miss [A] Baltimore _ [Gbm] _ _
[Db] Crowns.
[Eb] [D] How many [Gbm] sweaters [Gb] do you own?
[F] Well, I'm sure I've [Gb] got plenty.
[Ab] Let me see, I [D] have three, five, wait, I have 20.
[Bm] I would say, oi, gabault, but I can't.
[Db] I'm Miss [Gbm] Baltimore Crabs.
[D] _
_ _ [Bb] _ [Bm] You're too wide from the back.
[D] Honey, look at her front.
[Dbm] Wait, are we on candid camera?
Okay, where's Alan [Gb] Fudge?
[Db] Do you dance like you dress?
[Gb] Girls, there's no need to be cruel.
[Db] Would you swim in an [G] integrated pool?
I [N] sure would.
I'm all for integration.
It's the new frontier.
_ Not in Baltimore, it isn't.
Can I audition for Corny now? _
_ I'm his producer, and may I be frank?
[Gm] First impressions [Eb] can be tough, [E] and when I saw [Bb] you, I knew it.
[D] If your [Gm] size [Ab] weren't [D] enough, [Ebm] your last answer just [Bb] quit.
[Abm] And so, my dear, so loud and stout, [Bm] you'll never be in.
So we're [E] kicking you out.
[Bb] With your form [Dbm] and your face, well, it [Eb] isn't your fault.
You're just [Ab] down with a case [Abm] of Miss _ Baltimore.
_ _ [D] _ [Eb] _ [Abm] _ _ _ _
[Bb] _ _ _ _ [Abm] _ _ _ _
[Dbm] _ _ _ _ [Abm] _ _ _ _
[Dbm] _ _ _ _ [E] You may go. _
[Eb] Uh, thank you?
[Abm] _ I can tell, [Dbm] they really liked you.
_ [C] _ [B] _ [E] _ _
[Abm] _ _ Hello, ma'am, [Gb] I want to audition.
And I want to be 18 again.
[Eb] How about you bow [B] and exult?
[Eb] For I was Miss [Abm] Baltimore. _
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