The Real Slim Shady Chords by Eminem

[Cm] _ [Fm] _ _ [G] _ [Abm] May I have [G] your attention [Ab] please?
_ May I have your attention please?
[G] [C] Will the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand [Eb] up?
I [G] repeat, will the real [Ab] Slim Shady please stand up?
We're gonna have a problem here.
Y'all act like you've never seen a white person before, jaws [Eb] all on the floor like Pam [G] and Tommy just burstin' the [Eb] door.
Started [Fm] whoopin' her ass worse than [Ab] before, they personally divorced, throwin' her over furniture.
It's the return of the- aw, wait, no wait, you're kidding.
He didn't [G] just say what I think he [Cm] did, did he?
And [Fm] Dr.
Dre said, nothing [Cm] you idiots, Dr.
Dre's dead, locked in my basement.
Feminist women love Eminem.
Ticka ticka ticka [Bb] Slim Shady, [G] I'm sick of him, look at him.
Walkin' [Fm] around, grabbin' his you-know [Eb]-what, flippin' a you-know-who.
Yeah, but he's so cute though.
Yeah, I probably [Fm] got a couple of screws up in [Cm] my head loose, but no worse than what's goin' [G] on in your parents' bedrooms.
[Eb] [Fm] Sometimes I wanna get on TV [Eb] and just let loose, but can't, but it's cool for [G] Tom Green to hump a dead moose.
[Ab] My um is on your lips, my um is on your lips, and if I'm lucky you might [G] just give it a little piss.
[Ab] And that's the message that we deliver to little kids and expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is.
Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is by the time they hit fourth grade.
They got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
We ain't nothin' but mammals.
Well, some of us cannibals who cut other people open like cantaloupes.
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes, then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope.
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote.
Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the [G] chorus, and it [Cm] goes.
I'm Slim Shady, [Fm] yes, I'm the [Eb] real Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys are [G] just in [Cm] my paintings.
So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Eb] Please stand up, [G] please [Cm] stand up.
Cause I'm Slim Shady, [Fm] yes, I'm the [Eb] real Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys [Dm] are just in [Cm] my paintings.
So won't the real Slim [Fm] Shady please stand up?
[Eb] Please stand up, please stand up.
Well, Slim don't [Fm] got a cluster this rap can [Eb] sell records.
Well, I do.
So [G] fuck him and fuck him too.
You think I [Ab] give a damn about a Grammy?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, [G] let alone stand me.
[Eb] But Slim, [C] what if you win?
Wouldn't it be [Eb] weird?
Why?
You guys can just [G] lie to get me [Ab] here.
So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears.
And you can ask your 16-year-old Agalera, better switch me chairs.
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst.
And hear him argue over who she [G] gave head to [Cm] first.
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV.
Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim.
I should download her audio [Ab] on MP3.
And show the whole world how you gave him an MVD.
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups.
All you do is annoy me.
So I have been sitting here to destroy you.
And there's a million of us just like me.
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me.
Who dress like me, walk, talk and act like me.
It just might be the next [Cm] best thing.
But not like me.
I'm Slim Shady.
[Fm] Yes, I'm the [Eb] real Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys are [Dm] just [Cm] demonetized.
So I'm the real Slim [Fm] Shady.
Please [Eb] stand up, please stand up, [G] please stand up.
[Cm] Cause I'm the Slim Shady.
[Fm] Yes, I'm the [Eb] real Shady.
All you other Slim Shadys [Dm] are just [Cm] demonetized.
So I'm the real Slim [Fm] Shady.
Please stand up, [Eb] please stand up, [G] please stand up.
I'm [G] like a head trip [Fm] to listen to.
Cause I'm [Ab] only giving you things you joke about with your [G] friends.
Inside your living room the only [Dbm] difference is that I [D] got the balls.
To say it in front of y'all.
And I don't gotta [G] be false.
sugar [Eb]-coated at all I just get on the mic and spit it and whether you like to admit it
I just shit it better than 90% of you rappers out kid
then you wonder how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums is funny
[Fm] at the rate I'm going when I'm 30 [Eb] I'll be the [G] only person in the nursing home flirty
[Ab] pinch a nurse's asses when I'm jacking off a Jurgens and I'm jerking
but this whole back [G] of a hacker isn't working
[Ab] and every single person is a slim [Fm] shady lurking
[Eb] you could be working at Burger [Cm] King spitting on your onion ring
or in the parking lot circling screaming I don't give a fuck
with his windows down and his system up
so want the real shady please [Ab] stand up
put one of those fingers on each stand up
and be proud to be out of your mind and out of [F] control
and one [Cm] more time, loud as you can
how's it go?
I'm Slim Shady [Fm] yes I'm the real shady
[Eb] all you other slim shadies [G] are just [Cm] imitating
so want the real slim [Fm] shady please stand up
[Eb] please stand up, [G] please stand up
[Cm] cuz I'm Slim Shady [Fm] yes I'm the [Eb] real shady
all you other slim shadies [Dm] are just [G] imitating
[Cm] so want the real slim shady [Fm] please stand up
[Cm] please stand up, please stand up
I'm Slim Shady yes I'm the [Fm] real shady
[Eb] All you other Slim Stadies [G] are just imitating
[Cm] So won't the real Slim [Fm] Stadie please stand up
[Eb] Please stand up
[G] Please stand up
[Cm] Cos I'm Slim Stadie
[Fm] Yes I'm the [Eb] real Stadie
All you other Slim Stadies [G] are just [Cm] imitating
So won't the real Slim Stadie please [Fm] stand up
[Eb] Please stand up
Please [Cm] stand up
I _ [G] guess there is a Slim Stadie in all of [Cm]
us
_ Pardon?
_ Oh, there is?
_ _ _ [Ab] _ _ _ [G] _ [Ab] _
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[Ab] _ _ _ _ _ _ [Bb] _ [Ab] _
_ _ _ [G] _ _ [Ab] _ [G] _ _
[Cm] _ _ _ [D] _ _ _ _ [Cm] _
_ _ _ [Fm] _ _ _ [N] _ _